Monday, 2 December 2013

Part 1 - The Truth About Being Gay in Sydney Australia

This blog is an honest account of my life as a gay person living in Sydney and what it is truly like in Australia as a gay person living in a multicultural relationship. I will reveal illegal activities of a family and the inadequacies of a so-called "gay action group" funded by the government which has become the self-proclaimed unofficial governing body of the Australian gay population yet is operated more like a gay mafia.

This is not my bitter pill hard to swallow. It is an honest and truthful revelation where having come to a junction in my life I've decided to share a real gay story, the kind a certain gay action group would prefer mainstream Australia doesn't know about.

I've changed the names of the people in this blog mainly to protect the innocent and reluctantly to protect the guilty.

If anyone reading this blog associates him or herself to any of the people I write about that is your cross to bear and may simply be coincidental.... or not. This blog is not written with the intent to offend, but more so to share an experience which I believe to be far too common in Sydney yet is over shadowed by the small band of constantly out spoken and self gratifying gay activists who may not necessarily represent the true quality of the average gay Australian.

My story is real and no doubt one of many, but I can only express mine and let those too afraid to speak out frankly for the fear of the backlash of the so-called "gay community" and it's powerful and very influential action group maybe read this blog and perhaps gain strength to be honest as well.

In 1994 I met a guy at the Albury Hotel which was Sydney's most popular gay bar. This was back during the time when there actually was a sense of community amongst gay people, but that's another blog post.

I'll refer to him as "Choi" a naturalised Australian from Johor Baru in Malaysia 6 years my senior (he was 34 at the time). We dated for a year before deciding to move in with each other.

However we weren't allowed to move into the apartment he owned in Surry Hills because his mother, who lived in Malaysia and had no financial investment in the apartment, had told him he couldn't. I thought this was odd, but respecting what I then thought was a cultural thing. We moved into a flat in Dulwich Hill instead.

We spent 14 years together. Most people we knew had assumed we were the couple that was going to be together for ever, but of course that was never to be. Partly because of his infidelities and mostly because of the constant interference from his sisters.

I have so much to write about in this blog concerning the illegal activities of the family who bent the law to suit their needs and worked hard to break down our relationship and I want so much to express the real nature of a gay relationship in Australia which underpins what really happens within the confines of the so-called "gay community" and it's unofficial governing body.

I'm not sure where to begin exactly so I will start with briefly outlining the story of a relationship that didn't simply breakdown, but was systematically destroyed by a family who's interests were based on their own material gain.

When Choi and I had moved in together I had a successful job, was renting a small house, owned all my own furniture and a car. My life was like any other person's living in Australia. By the time he threw me out 14 years later for a young asian boy 20 years his junior I was left with literally nothing apart from the clothes on my back and desperate to find a job.

He was never faithful. Within the first few months of us living together I watched in disbelief as he walked into the entrance of Signal (a gay cruising place on Riley St where people pay an entrance fee to engage in anonymous sex). I told him back then what I saw and he swore to never do it again. I trusted him.

His sisters were another story.

One sister was completing her Law Degree at Sydney University. She was married with two children. Her husband was relatively successful and they owned a modest apartment in Ultimo which a few years later they sold and upgraded to a more lavish one on Pitt St in Sydney.

This sister was doing her degree under the HECS scheme which back then was a government assisted payment scheme to pay your university fees. Students could defer payment of their university fees until such time when they had completed their degree and were working full time, then earning a certain annual salary at which time they would pay a percentage of what they owed during their income tax claim each financial year.

However she never paid the HECS. Once she had completed her degree she set up a law business in Johor Baru and her and her family returned to Malaysia. Law Degree under her arm and the Australian tax payer footing the bill.

Several years later she sent her eldest son back to Sydney to do the same thing, this time with a degree in economics. Two university educations thanks to the Australian Tax payer.

The sisters were never kind to me. Although they speak English as well as anyone whenever they were with us they spoke in Chinese. Often when we visited Choi was offered a meal while I remained obligated to sitting quietly perhaps with a glass of juice. Why did I put up with this you ask? Well I loved him and to me I considered I wasn't dating his sisters so to tolerate their bad behaviour was testimony to him just how much I cared for him.

But I'm getting ahead of myself.

In my next blog post I'll share the reaction of Choi's inner city gay friends to me. A guy from the outer suburbs who had never met a gay person before and had never been to Oxford St.

(next - are these people typically gay?)

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