I've received several messages from mainly Sydney gay men who have been reading this blog. Of course no offer of support or exchange of stories have been made, instead there seems a sullen resentment about this blog. Apparently the raw honesty at which I am posting seems to have struck a nerve because the messages I am receiving have been nothing more than rude comments or nasty remarks concerning the break up of my long term relationship. I suppose I'm not very surprised because my experience with the Sydney gay public has taught me well.
For me the reality is that I hit the ground running when Choi chose to abandon me and throw me onto the street. I know that had he been placed in a similar situation he would never have survived the way I did.
These days I'm in a good place and more content than I have been for a very long time. Do I resent what Choi did to me? I guess not. I was thrown into chaos and came out of it a stronger, more realistic and honorable person. I don't waste my time and certainly couldn't be bothered with gay people (at least not here in Australia anyway). I found out who my real friends are and discovered a world of lies, fraud and cruelty that shouldn't exist. I'll leave that world for the gay men and women of Sydney who created it to scramble around in as that seems to be their choice and certainly not mine.
Many years ago I moved from the western suburbs to be in a relationship with a guy who never left the bubble of the gay world in the inner city suburbs of Sydney. My life changed forever and not necessarily for the best. I was behind before anyone would ever accept me as being just another member of the human race.
Being gay is not a privilege, it's not a choice and it's certainly not easy. But the people who make it that way are gay men and women themselves. Until they accept they are just like everybody else in Australia they will always be fighting a losing battle between themselves.